Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
We won´t have internet after tomorrow, so I just wanted to say that it might be a while before there are any new posts here!
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Thursday, December 28, 2006
Saturday, December 23, 2006
Another list
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
Things to do while waiting for your hair-dye/henna/deep treatment/hair-whatever to set it:
--chase your daughter around the apartment like crazy people
--dance to your own embarassment and your daughter´s delight
--eat fruit
--kiss away all the stuffed animal´s wawas.
--let your daughter clean the bathroom walls with a dry sponge
--drink large amounts of cola to help improve caffeine intake
--watch MASH or the A-Team
--decide how dark you want to go with the tanning lotion
--massage daughter´s constipated belly with olive oil or baby oil
--decide what´s for dinner
--clean up the mess you made in the bathroom
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Things to do while waiting for your hair-dye/henna/deep treatment/hair-whatever to set it:
--chase your daughter around the apartment like crazy people
--dance to your own embarassment and your daughter´s delight
--eat fruit
--kiss away all the stuffed animal´s wawas.
--let your daughter clean the bathroom walls with a dry sponge
--drink large amounts of cola to help improve caffeine intake
--watch MASH or the A-Team
--decide how dark you want to go with the tanning lotion
--massage daughter´s constipated belly with olive oil or baby oil
--decide what´s for dinner
--clean up the mess you made in the bathroom
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Wednesday, December 20, 2006
Alhamdulillah
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I need to take one deep breath...or maybe lots of deep breaths.
I don´t feel too great. Alhamdulillah.
My daughter ransacked the living room for probably the 5th or 6th time today and I don´t know how much time I have until my husband gets back, because he is with a friend of his in the city...
Oh well...the kitchen is clean (although I have to do the dishes from dinner), the bathroom is clean, and the apartment is clean in general...it´s just that I need to pick up tons and tons of toys and books. SubhanAllah, she even through the cushions from the sofa on the floor...not to mention my prayer garment..and her prayer garment...the ad flyer for the local grocery store, all her stuffed animals, etc.
...............................
I don´t particularly mind that she nearly ripped to pieces a wedding invitation that I recieved. The bride was my best friend right up until the end of the summer before college began. She went to a college that was about 7 hours away from our city and I went to another that is about 2.5 hours away...we decided to stay in contact through post (snail mail) and at first it went really well....but then I was disturbed by the fact that she didn´t actually read the letter s that I wrote her, because she would ask the same questions over and over again in each letter I recieved from her.
I was upset, but I didn´t make too big of a deal out of it. Later, on, however, we decided that we wanted to spend our first college spring break in Germany and we went together. I didn´t have a credit card to make our reservations, so my mother made them for us. I paid my mother back less than a week later....my friend gaver her 40 bucks and told us that she would be able to pay the rest back soon. I think it´s almost 5 years later and she has never paid my mom back a dime after that first 40...subhanAllah it makes me pretty mad, because my mom has MS and is living on disability retirement...it´s not like she has a lot to go around. Still, my mom has written it off, alhamdulillah.
There were a lot of other issues, too, and eventually, I thought it was in my best interest to cut relations with this girl.
Anywho...She also sent a letter along with the invitation and now I must think carefully about whether I really want to respond. Perhaps she has grown up a bit? Perhaps she is somehow "vernünftiger" than she used to be. Allahu alim. At the very least, I don´t have to worry too much about her showing up on my front door, because we live on opposite sides of the ocean, alhamdulillah, although she did threaten to show up on my door, because she can´t get traveling out of her blood...hmm. I guess I answered my own question.
Deep down, I don´t hate this girl. She was, after all, my best friend, subhanAllah...on the other hand, I sometimes wonder why. I have always been the slightly cold, logical type. I do harbour an unending love for English poety from the Romantic Era and I do love nature and am a romantic in a lonely-cup-of-tea-on-a-snowy-winter-day kind of way, but I have a way about me in that I almost always keep a level head in any situation. Even if I am thrown by something, I would never let people notice. She´s the kind of girl that seems very romantic, but has a smile that doesn´t go to her eyes which makes me kind of nervous and unlikely to trust her. And she is the kind of girl to say things to please people without really liking them or believing the words that are coming out of her mouth...which is what lead me to notice that strange smile of hers.
Maybe I found something in her that I don´t have myself. Good or bad, the nonsense that she brought into my life at the time was a good thing and knowing her created a deep love in my heart for tiny, warm coffee shops that don´t fall under the "Starbucks" category. I love sitting in a deep comfortable chair and chatting with a friend in a cafe full of warm wood and warm smells. It´s great, mashaAllah.
But I have this strange dislike of almost anything else related to her. I don´t know exactly what it is. I don´t like her handwriting. I don´t like her hair. I don´t like the way she speaks. I don´t like the way she believes almost everything she hears. I don´t like the way that she tries to use other people. I don´t like it. Something about her disturbs me. AsdaghfiruAllah.
I think that I should probably make lots of dua that Allah subhanahuwata´ala guide her to the right path and that He open my heart. Allahu Alim. I don´t llike it that I think badly of another person. It doesn´t suit me or the kind of person I am.
I guess I wanted to rant about this. I can´t tell my husband this kind of stuff. He asked who she was and I told him about the 700 dollars she didn´t repay my mom...that´s about it. I don´t want to rant to him about all of the feelings that this invitation brought back to me...
Wallahi I still love this girl´s sister and her mother...it´s just her. Something about her rubs me the wrong way...and yet, I think that I would still be willling to sit down with her for a cup of coffee if she were in town, hehe.
Anywho...that´s about it. I should probably attend to Jayjay and the mess she made...I might put a load in the washer, too...interesting, huh, hehe?
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
I need to take one deep breath...or maybe lots of deep breaths.
I don´t feel too great. Alhamdulillah.
My daughter ransacked the living room for probably the 5th or 6th time today and I don´t know how much time I have until my husband gets back, because he is with a friend of his in the city...
Oh well...the kitchen is clean (although I have to do the dishes from dinner), the bathroom is clean, and the apartment is clean in general...it´s just that I need to pick up tons and tons of toys and books. SubhanAllah, she even through the cushions from the sofa on the floor...not to mention my prayer garment..and her prayer garment...the ad flyer for the local grocery store, all her stuffed animals, etc.
...............................
I don´t particularly mind that she nearly ripped to pieces a wedding invitation that I recieved. The bride was my best friend right up until the end of the summer before college began. She went to a college that was about 7 hours away from our city and I went to another that is about 2.5 hours away...we decided to stay in contact through post (snail mail) and at first it went really well....but then I was disturbed by the fact that she didn´t actually read the letter s that I wrote her, because she would ask the same questions over and over again in each letter I recieved from her.
I was upset, but I didn´t make too big of a deal out of it. Later, on, however, we decided that we wanted to spend our first college spring break in Germany and we went together. I didn´t have a credit card to make our reservations, so my mother made them for us. I paid my mother back less than a week later....my friend gaver her 40 bucks and told us that she would be able to pay the rest back soon. I think it´s almost 5 years later and she has never paid my mom back a dime after that first 40...subhanAllah it makes me pretty mad, because my mom has MS and is living on disability retirement...it´s not like she has a lot to go around. Still, my mom has written it off, alhamdulillah.
There were a lot of other issues, too, and eventually, I thought it was in my best interest to cut relations with this girl.
Anywho...She also sent a letter along with the invitation and now I must think carefully about whether I really want to respond. Perhaps she has grown up a bit? Perhaps she is somehow "vernünftiger" than she used to be. Allahu alim. At the very least, I don´t have to worry too much about her showing up on my front door, because we live on opposite sides of the ocean, alhamdulillah, although she did threaten to show up on my door, because she can´t get traveling out of her blood...hmm. I guess I answered my own question.
Deep down, I don´t hate this girl. She was, after all, my best friend, subhanAllah...on the other hand, I sometimes wonder why. I have always been the slightly cold, logical type. I do harbour an unending love for English poety from the Romantic Era and I do love nature and am a romantic in a lonely-cup-of-tea-on-a-snowy-winter-day kind of way, but I have a way about me in that I almost always keep a level head in any situation. Even if I am thrown by something, I would never let people notice. She´s the kind of girl that seems very romantic, but has a smile that doesn´t go to her eyes which makes me kind of nervous and unlikely to trust her. And she is the kind of girl to say things to please people without really liking them or believing the words that are coming out of her mouth...which is what lead me to notice that strange smile of hers.
Maybe I found something in her that I don´t have myself. Good or bad, the nonsense that she brought into my life at the time was a good thing and knowing her created a deep love in my heart for tiny, warm coffee shops that don´t fall under the "Starbucks" category. I love sitting in a deep comfortable chair and chatting with a friend in a cafe full of warm wood and warm smells. It´s great, mashaAllah.
But I have this strange dislike of almost anything else related to her. I don´t know exactly what it is. I don´t like her handwriting. I don´t like her hair. I don´t like the way she speaks. I don´t like the way she believes almost everything she hears. I don´t like the way that she tries to use other people. I don´t like it. Something about her disturbs me. AsdaghfiruAllah.
I think that I should probably make lots of dua that Allah subhanahuwata´ala guide her to the right path and that He open my heart. Allahu Alim. I don´t llike it that I think badly of another person. It doesn´t suit me or the kind of person I am.
I guess I wanted to rant about this. I can´t tell my husband this kind of stuff. He asked who she was and I told him about the 700 dollars she didn´t repay my mom...that´s about it. I don´t want to rant to him about all of the feelings that this invitation brought back to me...
Wallahi I still love this girl´s sister and her mother...it´s just her. Something about her rubs me the wrong way...and yet, I think that I would still be willling to sit down with her for a cup of coffee if she were in town, hehe.
Anywho...that´s about it. I should probably attend to Jayjay and the mess she made...I might put a load in the washer, too...interesting, huh, hehe?
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Saturday, December 16, 2006
A day in the life of.....
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I had a very normal, typical day today...well, I did get a package from my mom, so there is an exception.
It started out a little late, made oatmeal with milk and honey for breakfast; played with Jayjay; prayed my prayers; read some Qur´an; cleaned a little; did the abc zoo game with Jayjay at fisher price; talked to my husband on the phone and almost got into an argument with him, because I don´t agree with a job he has taken on; played with Jayjay some more; made dinner for Jayjay and I; my husband came home and I made dinner for him; I layed down for 30 minutes and then got back up again; my husband went to lay down and maybe sleep; and here I am now.
I think that maybe I will go take a shower (and take Jayjay with me, because she is still awake, but starting to get sleepy)...inshaAllah a shower will push her over the edge and make her want to sleep.
Anywho............I am really disturbed by this job that my husband has taken. I think that it is wrong from an Islamic standpoint even though it´s nothing big. My husband doesn´t agree with me and says that I´m crazy. I am not happy about it. Not at all.
..................................
Jayjay´s package was nice, alhamdulillah. My mom sent a knit poncho, mittens and a hat...and a really pretty dress and three pairs of tights, mashaAllah. All of it is adorable, mashaAllah. InshaAllah Jayjay will get a chance to wear the dress for Eid wa Allahu Alim.
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
I had a very normal, typical day today...well, I did get a package from my mom, so there is an exception.
It started out a little late, made oatmeal with milk and honey for breakfast; played with Jayjay; prayed my prayers; read some Qur´an; cleaned a little; did the abc zoo game with Jayjay at fisher price; talked to my husband on the phone and almost got into an argument with him, because I don´t agree with a job he has taken on; played with Jayjay some more; made dinner for Jayjay and I; my husband came home and I made dinner for him; I layed down for 30 minutes and then got back up again; my husband went to lay down and maybe sleep; and here I am now.
I think that maybe I will go take a shower (and take Jayjay with me, because she is still awake, but starting to get sleepy)...inshaAllah a shower will push her over the edge and make her want to sleep.
Anywho............I am really disturbed by this job that my husband has taken. I think that it is wrong from an Islamic standpoint even though it´s nothing big. My husband doesn´t agree with me and says that I´m crazy. I am not happy about it. Not at all.
..................................
Jayjay´s package was nice, alhamdulillah. My mom sent a knit poncho, mittens and a hat...and a really pretty dress and three pairs of tights, mashaAllah. All of it is adorable, mashaAllah. InshaAllah Jayjay will get a chance to wear the dress for Eid wa Allahu Alim.
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Saturday, December 09, 2006
I have created a monster...
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
Well...Allah ta´ala created the monster...I´m just in charge of raising her, hehe.
My now 16 month old daughter has learned how to drag chairs around and climb up on them so that she can grab things that would usually be too high for her...
Why do I feel like I am really in for trouble now?
She has also started having minor temper tantrums...she whines....ugh. I hate whining... I try to ignore it, so that she learns that whining won´t get her what she wants, but it´s really really annoying.
She also says "wa wa" now, mashaAllah, meaning ouch. She actually uses it in multiple situations...when she´s scared, when she actually does hurt herself, and when she´s whining.
...............................................................................
Alhamdulillah, I am starting to feel a little better. The sinus cold is starting to subside, alhamdulillah... I still feel really tired, but alhamdulillah, it´s gotten a little better...maybe because I am consciously drinking more caffeine during the day and am eating a little more salt. Allahu Alim.
I have to go to two doctors on Monday, though, inshaAllah. A dermatologist for an allergy test and my family doctor, because she now has the results from the ENT doctor... InshaAllah, the dermatologist will be able to tell me what caused my horrible allergic reaction in Syria. It was really awful and I would love to know what caused it so that I can avoid it in the future, inshaAllah.
Other than that, I was told that I will probably be prescribed drops for low blood pressure that I will have to take for a while, but inshaAllah I won´t have to take them forever. InshaAllah they will work, because the dizziness is getting to be a problem for me.
http://www.vaughns-1-pagers.com/medicine/blood-pressure.htm
Well...it´s nice to know that I probably won´t have heart problems later on, huh?
Oh well...inshaAllah khair.
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Well...Allah ta´ala created the monster...I´m just in charge of raising her, hehe.
My now 16 month old daughter has learned how to drag chairs around and climb up on them so that she can grab things that would usually be too high for her...
Why do I feel like I am really in for trouble now?
She has also started having minor temper tantrums...she whines....ugh. I hate whining... I try to ignore it, so that she learns that whining won´t get her what she wants, but it´s really really annoying.
She also says "wa wa" now, mashaAllah, meaning ouch. She actually uses it in multiple situations...when she´s scared, when she actually does hurt herself, and when she´s whining.
...............................................................................
Alhamdulillah, I am starting to feel a little better. The sinus cold is starting to subside, alhamdulillah... I still feel really tired, but alhamdulillah, it´s gotten a little better...maybe because I am consciously drinking more caffeine during the day and am eating a little more salt. Allahu Alim.
I have to go to two doctors on Monday, though, inshaAllah. A dermatologist for an allergy test and my family doctor, because she now has the results from the ENT doctor... InshaAllah, the dermatologist will be able to tell me what caused my horrible allergic reaction in Syria. It was really awful and I would love to know what caused it so that I can avoid it in the future, inshaAllah.
Other than that, I was told that I will probably be prescribed drops for low blood pressure that I will have to take for a while, but inshaAllah I won´t have to take them forever. InshaAllah they will work, because the dizziness is getting to be a problem for me.
From wikipedia:
"Effects of low blood pressure
Main article: Hypotension
Blood pressure that is too low is known as hypotension. The similarity in pronunciation with hypertension can cause confusion.
Low blood pressure may be a sign of severe disease and requires urgent medical attention.
When blood pressure and blood flow decrease beyond a certain point, the perfusion of the brain becomes critically decreased (i.e., the blood supply is not sufficient), causing lightheadedness, dizziness, weakness and fainting.
However, people who function well while maintaining low blood pressures have lower rates of cardiovascular disease events than people with normal blood pressures."
http://www.vaughns-1-pagers.com/medicine/blood-pressure.htm
Well...it´s nice to know that I probably won´t have heart problems later on, huh?
Oh well...inshaAllah khair.
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Friday, December 08, 2006
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
Just because I know you are all desperate to be spending even MORE time at your computers and online...........
There are a whole bunch of sites out there with games that you can play online with your children, mashaAllah, that will inshaAllah actually teach them something.
They are especially great for me, because we don´t want to be buying a lot of things that we will just have to either leave behind or which will take up space in our luggage when we move (we plan on only bringing what´s necessary and selling the rest, inshaAllah...)
Here are a few that I think are cute...
Just because I know you are all desperate to be spending even MORE time at your computers and online...........
There are a whole bunch of sites out there with games that you can play online with your children, mashaAllah, that will inshaAllah actually teach them something.
They are especially great for me, because we don´t want to be buying a lot of things that we will just have to either leave behind or which will take up space in our luggage when we move (we plan on only bringing what´s necessary and selling the rest, inshaAllah...)
Here are a few that I think are cute...
(okay, the rabbit is kind of creepy, but it might be fun for kids, inshaAllah, hehehe)
http://goodnightstories.com/hear.htm
My daughter doesn´t take much of an interest in a whole lot of the stuff, but she finds the stuff like the coloring pages where you tap any key and the colors show up automatically pretty cool, mashaAllah and find the bear is fun with her, too, but she loses interest after a couple minutes.
My daughter doesn´t take much of an interest in a whole lot of the stuff, but she finds the stuff like the coloring pages where you tap any key and the colors show up automatically pretty cool, mashaAllah and find the bear is fun with her, too, but she loses interest after a couple minutes.
(The photo above is from Ikea...but I thought it fit the topic...kind of)
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Thursday, December 07, 2006
May Allah ta´ala make you satisfied in this life and in the next
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
Alhamdulillah, I am a woman. I love to have things orderly....I probably mentioned that before.
I am trying to decide whether my desire to have a nice home makes me materialistic? Is wanting to have a nice life in this world a bad thing, even though I know that it is only a passing thing? Allahu Alim.
I mean...is it okay to want to have nice things? After prayers, fasts, dhikr, dua, Qur´an, and keeping the home clean, is it okay to want to make sure that things aren´t only clean, but also attractive? Is it wrong to want to surround myself with things that make me smile? Snow white mouldings and cabinets? Smooth painted wood surfaces? Hardwood floors? Pretty fabrics in toile and stripes?
I want to make sure that my daughter grows up in a beautiful home. That doesn´t mean that things have to be expensive or even new...but they should look new (that´s why we have steel wool for the pots and pans, right?!?!?)...and they should be spotless and clean.
I don´t like it when paint starts to chip...that´s a sign that something needs to be repainted, inshaAllah and alhamdulillah sandpaper and paint are cheap, mashaAllah. I don´t like it when the bottoms of my pots start to blacken--that´s a sign for more steel wool and an overnight soak in the sink with bleach. I don´t like it when my things start to look old. We have all kinds of cleaners and wonderful things that you can buy at any drugstore that can help to preserve what we have...from the cabinets in the kitchen to the wash...alhamdulillah. Even if you do things the old-fashioned way (vinegar...bleach...baking powder...etc.) you can still keep things looking great.
I have probably become this way, because of my mother...yep, Freud´s theories sometimes do work, hehehe.
She doesn´t clean...sometimes I think she doesn´t even know how. The dishes could pile up for over a week. The stove was almost never cleaned and by the time that she moved out during my parents´ divorce, it was impossible (I mean that...) to clean off the char. The carpets hadn´t been cleaned thoroughly in years and although we pulled most of them up, there are still a few left that need to be tossed. There were clothes left over from the 70´s in her closet...not that that´s a bad thing, but they were laying dirty on the floor in there...or packed into garbage bags that never made it to the Salvation Army or Goodwill... Nothing was ever cleaned...until I got to high school and started teaching myself how to do it myself...and then it was sad, because even with my dad to help me, we couldn´t keep up with her mess...she was home the whole day to mess up all of our efforts, subhanAllah...and she wasn´t even trying...that´s just the way she is.
Her new apartment isn´t much better. She´s still a packrat, but I forgive her these days, because she is getting sicker and sicker...there are some things she just can´t help anymore. May Allah subhanahuwata´ala guide her and all my family to the right path. Ameen.
I don´t know if that is an excuse for my obsession with everything looking new and "bright and shiny". Allahu alim. I just hope that in case I am really materialistic that Allah subhanahuwata´ala forgives me. Only He knows what is really in my heart...better than myself even.
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Tuesday, December 05, 2006
A new day...
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
This is where I wish I were:
Isn´t it beautiful? It seems so serene, mashaAllah...and it reminds me a little bit of home--there are certainly a lot of places that look like this back home....mmm...peace.
My husband went to the immigration office today to renew my visa and give it one last go for a work visa for me...
Well....they didn´t exactly like my husband much...especially when he told them that his own passport was at the American consulate....well no...that was nothing compared to when my husband corrected the mean office lady´s grammer (her native tongue)...my husband informed me that she almost threw him out after that and yelled at him "You can LEAVE now!"
Yeah...so the husband is a nervous wreck and would love to punch someone (good thing he´s not a very violent guy these days...he did take a little wack at the wall, though)...and we are a bit worried about getting the last few papers into the consulate so that we can get his visa: Quick!!!
We would prefer not to get THROWN out of this God-forsaken country.
I am pretty worried about it, too, but inshaAllah khair. My dad has to get some papers together for us and my husband already has all of the things he needs, so alhamdulillah. What more can I ask for?
I am pretty happy, otherwise. I think that we can give our daughter a better life back home, inshaAllah, and that is one of my top priorities. And we will at least have some family there, albeit non-muslims...but Allahu alim...it´s a great chance for dawah, inshaAllah!
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
This is where I wish I were:
Isn´t it beautiful? It seems so serene, mashaAllah...and it reminds me a little bit of home--there are certainly a lot of places that look like this back home....mmm...peace.
My husband went to the immigration office today to renew my visa and give it one last go for a work visa for me...
Well....they didn´t exactly like my husband much...especially when he told them that his own passport was at the American consulate....well no...that was nothing compared to when my husband corrected the mean office lady´s grammer (her native tongue)...my husband informed me that she almost threw him out after that and yelled at him "You can LEAVE now!"
Yeah...so the husband is a nervous wreck and would love to punch someone (good thing he´s not a very violent guy these days...he did take a little wack at the wall, though)...and we are a bit worried about getting the last few papers into the consulate so that we can get his visa: Quick!!!
We would prefer not to get THROWN out of this God-forsaken country.
I am pretty worried about it, too, but inshaAllah khair. My dad has to get some papers together for us and my husband already has all of the things he needs, so alhamdulillah. What more can I ask for?
I am pretty happy, otherwise. I think that we can give our daughter a better life back home, inshaAllah, and that is one of my top priorities. And we will at least have some family there, albeit non-muslims...but Allahu alim...it´s a great chance for dawah, inshaAllah!
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Getting ready to launch
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
The good news in my life right now is that my dad has absolutely no problem with us staying by him. In fact, he seemed really happy about it, mashaAllah.
He also had no problem with the idea that I clean up and toss whatever I feel like it and get things organized. InshaAllah I think he will like having a woman in the house again...folded laundry...ooohhh....luxury, hehehehehe.
There is one condition:
My mother will NOT visit me. EVER. If I want to see her, I have to go to her place.
I don´t have a problem with this. I never much like cleaning up her mess anyway (not that I won´t be compulsively cleaning her place anyway when I visit, but I would probably freak out about her leaving behind a mess in my own dwelling).
My dad also said that he would pick up a new carseat for Jayjay on the way to the airport to pick us up, inshaAllah. Nice guy, huh? MashaAllah, that´s one less thing that we will have to take along with us and one less thing that we will need to buy, alhamdulillah!
Oki doki...that´s it for today...
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Monday, December 04, 2006
The news
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
There seem to be so many articles in the news lately about cases of child abuse and negligence and everything in between...
A man put a baby in the freezer, because it had a fever? And then he blamed it on the fact that he had no real parenting skills? Duh. Didn´t need to tell me that.
A woman put her baby in the microwave and ended up killing the poor thing. I think it was a month old.
In Germany, a baby was found in a freezer last week and in the last month there have been at least three child deaths due to parent negligence and abuse (this is me watching the news in Germany: "How can that *corpulent* woman STARVE HER CHILD TO DEATH!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! They obviously had more than enough food in the fridge for her and her boyfriend!".
There is something wrong with that. I mean, really. I can get pretty mad at my daughter. She is teething the last of her first four molars and cries more in the night now than she has in probably more than a year. All that crying and the effort that it takes to get her to finally fall asleep...it can get me really riled...and there have even been times in the past when I had to leave the room in order to stop myself from slapping her...but I haven´t slapped her. Because it´s not okay.
I have learned something, though.
My daughter is perfect.
She cries all the time these days. She takes all of the onions and potatoes out of their bins and leaves their peels all over the apartment. She dumps her apple juice on the couch. She slaps me in the head sometimes...oh and those head butts...she rips up any piece of paper she can get her hands on...put a writing utensil in her hand and she scribbles on everything including the walls. She never lets me sit at the computer on a chair--unless she´s up there with me...she dumps her toys all over the floor a dozen times in one day...not to mention the weeks I have lived through diarhea, fever, and teething.
But she has never done anything malicious--ever. She is not even 16 months old...she doesn´t even understand right and wrong...that will probably come some time after she *really* understands that no means no! and she is just not there yet, hehe.
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
There seem to be so many articles in the news lately about cases of child abuse and negligence and everything in between...
A man put a baby in the freezer, because it had a fever? And then he blamed it on the fact that he had no real parenting skills? Duh. Didn´t need to tell me that.
A woman put her baby in the microwave and ended up killing the poor thing. I think it was a month old.
In Germany, a baby was found in a freezer last week and in the last month there have been at least three child deaths due to parent negligence and abuse (this is me watching the news in Germany: "How can that *corpulent* woman STARVE HER CHILD TO DEATH!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! They obviously had more than enough food in the fridge for her and her boyfriend!".
There is something wrong with that. I mean, really. I can get pretty mad at my daughter. She is teething the last of her first four molars and cries more in the night now than she has in probably more than a year. All that crying and the effort that it takes to get her to finally fall asleep...it can get me really riled...and there have even been times in the past when I had to leave the room in order to stop myself from slapping her...but I haven´t slapped her. Because it´s not okay.
I have learned something, though.
My daughter is perfect.
She cries all the time these days. She takes all of the onions and potatoes out of their bins and leaves their peels all over the apartment. She dumps her apple juice on the couch. She slaps me in the head sometimes...oh and those head butts...she rips up any piece of paper she can get her hands on...put a writing utensil in her hand and she scribbles on everything including the walls. She never lets me sit at the computer on a chair--unless she´s up there with me...she dumps her toys all over the floor a dozen times in one day...not to mention the weeks I have lived through diarhea, fever, and teething.
But she has never done anything malicious--ever. She is not even 16 months old...she doesn´t even understand right and wrong...that will probably come some time after she *really* understands that no means no! and she is just not there yet, hehe.
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Pretty things
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
Who thinks that food should not only taste good, but be attractive, too?
Who thinks that it is not enough that the house is clean...but that it is welcoming and beautiful, too?
I do.
I am a woman. I love beautiful things. I love making even simple things look beautiful. I love putting beautiful clean linens on the bed. I love serving lemonade out of a beautiful glass pitcher.
I love these things.
I love all of the little things that make life somehow more pleasant and enjoyable.
I guess I have been spending too much time at the Pottery Barn website lately...
Here is what I found:
I really like that bed....I am searching high and low for more rea
sonable beds in the same style, but this one looks so much more solid than anything else out there that I have found online...
And look how clean the lines are! And even the dresser is high up off of the floor so the vacuum can fit under there! Pottery Barn is great, mashaAllah.....
If dreams come true....Allahu alim......this is what I am saving for!
And look at the other things that they have for serveware!
Can you believe this stuff??? The smooth clean lines? How lovely are these things?!?
I especially love this glass vase...the foot makes it appear like it came directly out of a painting, mashaAllah.....I can just imagine making a lovely lavender lemonade in the summer and serving it up out of a pitcher like this, inshaAllah!
Alhamdulillah I am young, hehe. I have many years up to save and eventually live the way that I would like to, inshaAllah. By the time I die, inshaAllah I will have just enough of the "frills" in life that make me want to smile when I wake up in the morning.
--sheets that smell of lavender, rose and sandlewood (I have that now)
--smooth cotton sheets
--warm slippers
--breakfast served on pretty plates complete with a pot of hot Earl Grey tea..mmm
--shelves to organize all of my linens and kitchen things, etc.
--lots of good smells and pretty sights and memories
My theory is that if I don´t love it, then it shouldn´t be in my house...
I want my child (and inshaAllah future children) to grow up in a peaceful home with a peaceful mother who is happy! These are a lot of material things above, but I suppose in my defense, I have lived without for most of my life and I know that these are things that make me smile (other than my husband and daughter, of course, hehe). I want my daughter to have many of the things that I didn´t have growing up--including the security of a home that is not only stable, but beautiful. A place that she can feel comfortable. A place where people are welcome to come in for a cup of coffee or tea and *feel* welcome. Where there is an overwhelming feeling of comfort.....
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Who thinks that food should not only taste good, but be attractive, too?
Who thinks that it is not enough that the house is clean...but that it is welcoming and beautiful, too?
I do.
I am a woman. I love beautiful things. I love making even simple things look beautiful. I love putting beautiful clean linens on the bed. I love serving lemonade out of a beautiful glass pitcher.
I love these things.
I love all of the little things that make life somehow more pleasant and enjoyable.
I guess I have been spending too much time at the Pottery Barn website lately...
Here is what I found:
I really like that bed....I am searching high and low for more rea
sonable beds in the same style, but this one looks so much more solid than anything else out there that I have found online...And look how clean the lines are! And even the dresser is high up off of the floor so the vacuum can fit under there! Pottery Barn is great, mashaAllah.....
If dreams come true....Allahu alim......this is what I am saving for!
And look at the other things that they have for serveware!
Can you believe this stuff??? The smooth clean lines? How lovely are these things?!?
I especially love this glass vase...the foot makes it appear like it came directly out of a painting, mashaAllah.....I can just imagine making a lovely lavender lemonade in the summer and serving it up out of a pitcher like this, inshaAllah!
Alhamdulillah I am young, hehe. I have many years up to save and eventually live the way that I would like to, inshaAllah. By the time I die, inshaAllah I will have just enough of the "frills" in life that make me want to smile when I wake up in the morning.
--sheets that smell of lavender, rose and sandlewood (I have that now)
--smooth cotton sheets
--warm slippers
--breakfast served on pretty plates complete with a pot of hot Earl Grey tea..mmm
--shelves to organize all of my linens and kitchen things, etc.
--lots of good smells and pretty sights and memories
My theory is that if I don´t love it, then it shouldn´t be in my house...
I want my child (and inshaAllah future children) to grow up in a peaceful home with a peaceful mother who is happy! These are a lot of material things above, but I suppose in my defense, I have lived without for most of my life and I know that these are things that make me smile (other than my husband and daughter, of course, hehe). I want my daughter to have many of the things that I didn´t have growing up--including the security of a home that is not only stable, but beautiful. A place that she can feel comfortable. A place where people are welcome to come in for a cup of coffee or tea and *feel* welcome. Where there is an overwhelming feeling of comfort.....
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Sunday, December 03, 2006
All the things she can do...
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I have been thinking...I am a little worried about how little Jayjay speaks...I mean, I know some start later rather than sooner, but Allahu alim...
Other than Baba and Mama, she can say (more or less):
Bear
Door
Dau (light in Arabic)
Baby
Jayjay
Mem (for food)
Nunu
Kaka
Bye-bye
No
She is really advanced physically, though, mashaAllah. She can walk backwards and has done so for well over a month now. She twirls in circles. She can crawl up onto just about anything. She can eat with a fork and is getting better with spoons, mashaAllah. She sings. She "reads." She runs. She is trying to learn how to jump. She crawls under things if she can´t go over them. She kisses. Etc.
InshaAllah it is nothing and I am just a typical anxious mama wondering when she´ll start saying more...Ya Allah, inshaAllah it will be soon! Ameen!
Anywho.......I, as always, have a battle plan.
Unfortunately, I am the kind of person who puts on the tv for background noise when my husband isn´t home...it makes me feel secure somehow...even if I am not in the room...I have noticed that Jayjay is actually starting to *watch* tv these days, though....so....out with the tv, in with nasheeds.
I am playing more games with her. I have a great nursery rhyme book. It has games and short little stories, too, mashaAllah and Jayjay seems to really like it. InshaAllah it will help her learn a few words...and a few things like "30 days hath September" which I never learned...but that´s another story.
I talk with her tons..and a whole lot more since she started talking to me, hehe.
I recite Qur´an for her anyway...I figure if Mozart is good, Qur´an has to work wonders, inshaAllah!
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Progress?
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
It looks more and more like we will be moving back to the states (well, actually, for my husband and daughter it will be their first time there...)
And it looks more and more like will have to move in with my dad for at least long enough to find a place of our own wa Allahu alim...
There are a few reasons I like that idea:
1. I love my dad.
2. We won´t have to pay for heating costs.
3. We won´t have to pay for much of anything else, either.
4. We will have a room to ourself (i.e. I can start to kick Jayjay out of my bed inshaAllah)
5. I can help my dad with the housework--his house is BIG--and he´s a MAN...you get the idea.
There are a few reasons I don´t like that idea:
1. The house is dirty-dirty-dirty. There are rugs everywhere that need to be thrown out; there are things that have not been cleaned in a good 15-20 years; there are lots and lots of things that need to be repaired or replaced...including entire walls...ugh; in pretty much every room, the ceilings, walls and maybe even floors need to be painted; all of the floors downstairs have to be refinished; etc. I suppose if I get the basic stuff done, though, I won´t complain about the other crud, inshaAllah...
2. My husband has never met my father...I don´t know if they will even like each other...alhamdulillah they are both good guys. InshaAllah it won´t be a problem!
3. I am an adult with my own family. It seems wierd that I would live with "Daddy."
...........
I guess the dirty thing is what has me staying up nights worrying about it.
There are things that would definately have to be done within the first few nights there, because my husband is hyperallergic and my daughter is really small...
Things like cleaning every room from top to bottom, and in the same breath, pulling up the dirty old carpets and tossing them out. Who knows what has GROWN under those carpets all the years that my mother used to live there...I mean, she didn´t bat an eye if juice spills didn´t get cleaned up or anything else that fell on the floor. The woman once left a stain of blood on my dad´s chair from her period...and he had to clean it up...
I am not saying that my dad is dirty. But he lives in a big three bedroom house all by himself. He usually only uses the bathroom, kitchen, his bedroom and the computer room...that´s it. The toilet and tub are clean...the kitchen table and counters are clean...his bed is made with clean linens...he thinks life is great! It´s just that he hasn´t gotten around to getting all of the junk that my mother accumulated all those years out of his life...
Honestly, I am a little upset and a little disappointed in all of the things that he HASN`T gotten around to doing. A while ago, he was so excited about being able to get things done for the first time in his life. He had a little hope. Now he spends most of his time outside of the hope (probably avoiding it just like he used to) and doesn´t really have the time to put a lot of care into things...
That..and he´s a guy. It´s not that he doesn´t really care, but I don´t think he KNOWS how to clean things as well as a person who has lived alone for a longer amount of time...or most women...face it..we´re just cleaner creatures than most men. Sorry Dad.
So....here are things that I need...and I may force my father to stop at Target or KMart or ShopKo or Walmart or Ikea or anywhere ON THE WAY HOME FROM THE AIRPORT!
-hangers
-canister vacuum...bagless is great
-fabric softener
-scented clorox
-a damp mop system
-dish towels
-microfiber cloths
-white primer paint
-white satin paint
-two vinyl shower curtains
-duct tape
I already have a box cutter and all kinds of other stuff, too, mashaAllah to help me get the carpets up, etc. My dad has all kinds of tools, so inshaAllah if something comes up I can research online how to fix it, inshaAllah...
........................
Here is my battle plan for the first night that I am at home:
-Put my old bedlinens or whatever is on my old bed in the washer and when that´s done...in the dryer.
-Clean out my brother´s old room, including the closet...that will be Jayjay´s room.
-Move my old bedset into her room and give it a good dusting.
-Damp mop the floor once more and make the bed.
-Put her clothes into the dressers and closet.
-Attack the bathroom.
-There is a problem with the wall in the tub...use the shower curtains to protect it.
-Clean the tub and toilet and sink.
-Toss old and unused and ugly linens out (or put them in a box to give away) and put clean, fresh attractive linens and towels back into the linen closet.
-Toss out old toiletries and junk in the linen closet. Arrange the nice stuff that we want to keep.
-Clean out the medicine cabinets.
-Mop the floor...and clean the corners with a sponge where needed...
After that, I can sleep and get on with the upstairs hallway, kitchen, pantry and carpets on the second day, inshaAllah.
Once the house is actually clean, though, I would like to paint the ceilings and mouldings white and maybe even paint the floors upstairs white, inshaAllah...and later on, a nice stencil design around the corners of the rooms and hallways would be nice, but Allahu alim whether we will even be there that long...stil, if I am in the states, I can at least help my dad out some with making his house a home, inshaAllah!
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
It looks more and more like we will be moving back to the states (well, actually, for my husband and daughter it will be their first time there...)
And it looks more and more like will have to move in with my dad for at least long enough to find a place of our own wa Allahu alim...
There are a few reasons I like that idea:
1. I love my dad.
2. We won´t have to pay for heating costs.
3. We won´t have to pay for much of anything else, either.
4. We will have a room to ourself (i.e. I can start to kick Jayjay out of my bed inshaAllah)
5. I can help my dad with the housework--his house is BIG--and he´s a MAN...you get the idea.
There are a few reasons I don´t like that idea:
1. The house is dirty-dirty-dirty. There are rugs everywhere that need to be thrown out; there are things that have not been cleaned in a good 15-20 years; there are lots and lots of things that need to be repaired or replaced...including entire walls...ugh; in pretty much every room, the ceilings, walls and maybe even floors need to be painted; all of the floors downstairs have to be refinished; etc. I suppose if I get the basic stuff done, though, I won´t complain about the other crud, inshaAllah...
2. My husband has never met my father...I don´t know if they will even like each other...alhamdulillah they are both good guys. InshaAllah it won´t be a problem!
3. I am an adult with my own family. It seems wierd that I would live with "Daddy."
...........
I guess the dirty thing is what has me staying up nights worrying about it.
There are things that would definately have to be done within the first few nights there, because my husband is hyperallergic and my daughter is really small...
Things like cleaning every room from top to bottom, and in the same breath, pulling up the dirty old carpets and tossing them out. Who knows what has GROWN under those carpets all the years that my mother used to live there...I mean, she didn´t bat an eye if juice spills didn´t get cleaned up or anything else that fell on the floor. The woman once left a stain of blood on my dad´s chair from her period...and he had to clean it up...
I am not saying that my dad is dirty. But he lives in a big three bedroom house all by himself. He usually only uses the bathroom, kitchen, his bedroom and the computer room...that´s it. The toilet and tub are clean...the kitchen table and counters are clean...his bed is made with clean linens...he thinks life is great! It´s just that he hasn´t gotten around to getting all of the junk that my mother accumulated all those years out of his life...
Honestly, I am a little upset and a little disappointed in all of the things that he HASN`T gotten around to doing. A while ago, he was so excited about being able to get things done for the first time in his life. He had a little hope. Now he spends most of his time outside of the hope (probably avoiding it just like he used to) and doesn´t really have the time to put a lot of care into things...
That..and he´s a guy. It´s not that he doesn´t really care, but I don´t think he KNOWS how to clean things as well as a person who has lived alone for a longer amount of time...or most women...face it..we´re just cleaner creatures than most men. Sorry Dad.
So....here are things that I need...and I may force my father to stop at Target or KMart or ShopKo or Walmart or Ikea or anywhere ON THE WAY HOME FROM THE AIRPORT!
-hangers
-canister vacuum...bagless is great
-fabric softener
-scented clorox
-a damp mop system
-dish towels
-microfiber cloths
-white primer paint
-white satin paint
-two vinyl shower curtains
-duct tape
I already have a box cutter and all kinds of other stuff, too, mashaAllah to help me get the carpets up, etc. My dad has all kinds of tools, so inshaAllah if something comes up I can research online how to fix it, inshaAllah...
........................
Here is my battle plan for the first night that I am at home:
-Put my old bedlinens or whatever is on my old bed in the washer and when that´s done...in the dryer.
-Clean out my brother´s old room, including the closet...that will be Jayjay´s room.
-Move my old bedset into her room and give it a good dusting.
-Damp mop the floor once more and make the bed.
-Put her clothes into the dressers and closet.
-Attack the bathroom.
-There is a problem with the wall in the tub...use the shower curtains to protect it.
-Clean the tub and toilet and sink.
-Toss old and unused and ugly linens out (or put them in a box to give away) and put clean, fresh attractive linens and towels back into the linen closet.
-Toss out old toiletries and junk in the linen closet. Arrange the nice stuff that we want to keep.
-Clean out the medicine cabinets.
-Mop the floor...and clean the corners with a sponge where needed...
After that, I can sleep and get on with the upstairs hallway, kitchen, pantry and carpets on the second day, inshaAllah.
Once the house is actually clean, though, I would like to paint the ceilings and mouldings white and maybe even paint the floors upstairs white, inshaAllah...and later on, a nice stencil design around the corners of the rooms and hallways would be nice, but Allahu alim whether we will even be there that long...stil, if I am in the states, I can at least help my dad out some with making his house a home, inshaAllah!
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Saturday, October 07, 2006
Perfection
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I am back...inshaAllah...I haven´t been in the best health or spirits lately. The doctor says that it´s probably because of low blood pressure wa Allahu alim. I still have a couple appointments coming up soon, but for now, I have been instructed to drink more coffee and caffeinated drinks hehe...and eat more salt...oh well, I guess that doesn´t mean I have to throw out my entire healthy diet, but still...
That said...onto my real thoughts for the day...
I have been pondering over how I´m going to improve my self-discipline. These goals are long-term and I will probably have to start out slow and build them up like any other habit. These things are the infrastructure of my ideal life.
Ideally.
Pray 5 fard.--no problem...even when I feel horrible, I can still guilt myself into moving my butt into the bathroom to make wudu, mashaAllah!
Pray 12 sunnah. --tougher--I don´t like the two before fajr...I usually feel dead in the morning and often dizzy...and praying doesn´t make it better.
Pray duha. --like above...sometimes sujood makes my entire head hurt. I know it´s an excuse. InshaAllah I will feel better...maybe I could concentrate on doing duha every other day?
Pray witr.
Pray tahhajud.
Read Qur´an 1 hour daily--arabic/english. --I´m working on it. It´s not like I don´t have enough time on my hands...but with my daughter around, sometimes I reach an hour..sometimes not.
Read at least one hadith daily. --No problem--jazakhAllah MO!
Fast mondays and fridays. --I´ve been lax, because of the low blood pressure thing, I have been having trouble with dizziness if I don´t eat enough...
Visit an islamic study group weekly.
Recite Qur´an to my daughter daily --No problem...I have enough time, inshaAllah. I usually go through the last 10 surat or so.
Daily dhikr --because I usually only say dhikr after prayers
Daily dua (for me, my family, my sisters and brothers in Islam, etc.) --like dhikr, I usually only make dua after prayer. InshaAllah I will get better about it.
Spotless home (my place of worship!!!)--no problem...I have obsessive compulsive personality disorder...
No tv...--Very tough...due to a soccer loving husband...
..........
There are also lots of other things that don´t have to deal with Islam, because I am just about as country-club prep as a Muslim woman can get, hehe. For example:
No more than 115 lbs (I´m 5´4")
Longish, healthy hair
Put together appearance
Clear skin
Attractive indoor and outdoor wardrobes
Attractive home (not to be confused with a clean home...I want it to look nice and comfy, too, inshaAllah)
These things are not too tough, inshaAllah. I am certainly not overweight, my hair is healthy, I have okay skin except maybe once a month, I have some nice clothes, and my home is slowly coming together, mashaAllah (to it all!)...
Oki doki...off to pray...and inshaAllah I will get my dhikr and dua in as usual and I will pray sunnah, inshaAllah!!!!!
Fi aman ALlah,
UmmJayjay
I am back...inshaAllah...I haven´t been in the best health or spirits lately. The doctor says that it´s probably because of low blood pressure wa Allahu alim. I still have a couple appointments coming up soon, but for now, I have been instructed to drink more coffee and caffeinated drinks hehe...and eat more salt...oh well, I guess that doesn´t mean I have to throw out my entire healthy diet, but still...
That said...onto my real thoughts for the day...
I have been pondering over how I´m going to improve my self-discipline. These goals are long-term and I will probably have to start out slow and build them up like any other habit. These things are the infrastructure of my ideal life.
Ideally.
Pray 5 fard.--no problem...even when I feel horrible, I can still guilt myself into moving my butt into the bathroom to make wudu, mashaAllah!
Pray 12 sunnah. --tougher--I don´t like the two before fajr...I usually feel dead in the morning and often dizzy...and praying doesn´t make it better.
Pray duha. --like above...sometimes sujood makes my entire head hurt. I know it´s an excuse. InshaAllah I will feel better...maybe I could concentrate on doing duha every other day?
Pray witr.
Pray tahhajud.
Read Qur´an 1 hour daily--arabic/english. --I´m working on it. It´s not like I don´t have enough time on my hands...but with my daughter around, sometimes I reach an hour..sometimes not.
Read at least one hadith daily. --No problem--jazakhAllah MO!
Fast mondays and fridays. --I´ve been lax, because of the low blood pressure thing, I have been having trouble with dizziness if I don´t eat enough...
Visit an islamic study group weekly.
Recite Qur´an to my daughter daily --No problem...I have enough time, inshaAllah. I usually go through the last 10 surat or so.
Daily dhikr --because I usually only say dhikr after prayers
Daily dua (for me, my family, my sisters and brothers in Islam, etc.) --like dhikr, I usually only make dua after prayer. InshaAllah I will get better about it.
Spotless home (my place of worship!!!)--no problem...I have obsessive compulsive personality disorder...
No tv...--Very tough...due to a soccer loving husband...
..........
There are also lots of other things that don´t have to deal with Islam, because I am just about as country-club prep as a Muslim woman can get, hehe. For example:
No more than 115 lbs (I´m 5´4")
Longish, healthy hair
Put together appearance
Clear skin
Attractive indoor and outdoor wardrobes
Attractive home (not to be confused with a clean home...I want it to look nice and comfy, too, inshaAllah)
These things are not too tough, inshaAllah. I am certainly not overweight, my hair is healthy, I have okay skin except maybe once a month, I have some nice clothes, and my home is slowly coming together, mashaAllah (to it all!)...
Oki doki...off to pray...and inshaAllah I will get my dhikr and dua in as usual and I will pray sunnah, inshaAllah!!!!!
Fi aman ALlah,
UmmJayjay
I´m back
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
After having spent about 3 months in Syria and then taking a little more time off, I´m back, inshaAllah.
Now I know that there aren´t many readers here...if any...but inshaAllah I´ll be posting a lot more in the future...
I have a lot on my mind, mashaAllah.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmJayjay
After having spent about 3 months in Syria and then taking a little more time off, I´m back, inshaAllah.
Now I know that there aren´t many readers here...if any...but inshaAllah I´ll be posting a lot more in the future...
I have a lot on my mind, mashaAllah.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmJayjay
Sunday, June 11, 2006
The joys of married life
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
So when I married, my husband and I were poor college students. Now...two years later, nothing has really changed.
My husband works full time now instead of going to his classes so that he can support us, alhamdulillah...but inshaAllah we´ll be moving soon, so that he can start up with the uni again in a year and a half or so, inshaAllah.....
That said, it´s started getting to me lately that we have NEVER had a real bed. When we were in the dorm, we just took my mattress out of my room and put our two mattresses together on the floor at night (and piled them up on his bed during the day)...and after we moved into our apartment, we got a sofa bed, which we used until it broke. We also got a bedframe (from the spring clean up...)...but no mattresses, so the bed serves more as a cover for all of our things than anything else... because we don´t have any storage room in the apartment, either...alhamdulillah.
We took a mattress with us from the dorm (because they got new mattresses that year, we just took the old one with us)...alhamdulillah that´s what Jayjay and I use these days.
I put the mattress on the bedframe even though the mattress is too small and Jayjay and I sleep in the bedroom...my husband sleeps on the couch...in the living room.
For some reason, when the mattress was in the living room, I didn´t mind it that much that we didn´t have a bed...but Jayjay just doesn´t sleep if there is any light (computer) or noise (Baba) in the room, subhanAllah. If I want her to go to sleep before her father (at 2 a.m.), she needs to have a seperate bedroom...I can only hope that when we move, I can get her a small toddler bed...and I can leave her in there for the night where she will inshaAllah not fall face first onto the floor if she wakes up in the middle of the night...for a while, though, she´ll have my old bed...
Alhamdulillah I have a place to sleep. Especially when there are so many people in the world that have so many more problems than I do, subhanAllah.
Oh well...alhamdulillah. While I don´t like it, I guess I have to live with it.
...................................................................................................................................................................
I´ve kind of been thinking lately that either something is in the air or something is wrong. I know way too many sisters who have been going through problems lately. Doesn´t it seem strange that a proportionately larger number of Muslimahs have depression, eating disorders, sleep disorders, etc??? Why do so many more of us seem to have problems than the general population.
A lot of women find themselves having problems in their marriage. Either they feel left out, lonely, taken for granted, required to take on their husband´s culture...or maybe even all of that together.
While I prefer staying at home, it´d certainly be comforting to know that my husband listened to something I said now and then...instead of giving me the answer "I´m not interested in what you were talking about" after I tell him the same thing three times repeatedly with no answer.
And while I´ve gotten used to it and probably a little too complacent, maybe other women have more trouble with it.
I´ve pretty much lost all hope for this world. I even get kind of upset when somebody (my husband?) tries to put hopes in my head--like saying "hey, when you get home from visiting my family, if it goes well and we can change your visa, you´ll find a big mattress on the bed"......I don´t want him to put ideas in my head. That´s the way people get hurt. I had enough of that crud growing up from my mother. None of it comes true. Don´t even think about it. It´s not going to happen. Just concentrate on your prayer, on taking care of relationship with Allah subhanahuwata´ala and taking care of your family and forget the rest. There´s nothing in this life and that´s the way it´s going to stay whether we like it or not. Start planning for what´ll happen after this life, because that´s all we´ve got that´s really certain.
A woman I know says no. Her life is worth living and that she is worth it. I can understand her. I wish that I were like her sometimes...but I don´t think that making myself false hopes is really going to help me. But is laundry really the only thing we have to look forward to in life? Is spending hours in the kitchen to make our husband´s favorite dish (yabra? mahshi? maqlooba?) really life?
Yep.
Get used to it.
Try to look forward to your children. Try to raise them to be good Muslims. Try to keep your home clean and relatively pleasant to live in. Try to make your food enjoyable. Sometimes...always...it´s the little things that count. If you can´t find pleasure in the mundane...then yeah...life isn´t really fun...but Allah subhanahuwata´ala tests the people He loves, inshaAllah...and if we bear it all with patience, inshaAllah we´ll be rewarded.
Am I depressed? Yep. Do I have an eating disorder? Yep, but I try to control it, because we´re not allowed to harm ourselves as Muslims. Do I have a sleep disorder. Oh yeah. Do I wish that my marriage were happier? Yep. Has this life beaten me down? Yep.
Am I ungrateful? NO.
I am happy to have what I have, alhamdulillah. I have lived with much less than what I do now and I am happy that I now have at least a small amount of control over the way I live, alhamdulillah. I am sooooo grateful that Allah subhanahuwata´ala led me to Islam, alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah that I am here and have a chance at achieving Jannah, inshaAllah.
So I go on. And I put on a smiling face for my husband, because he provides for us. And I put on a smiling face for my daughter, because she doesn´t need to know what´s going on. And I ut a happy face on for my neighbors and aquaintances and anybody else that I cross paths with, inshaAllah....because that´s also jihad for me. Self-control means a lot.
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
So when I married, my husband and I were poor college students. Now...two years later, nothing has really changed.
My husband works full time now instead of going to his classes so that he can support us, alhamdulillah...but inshaAllah we´ll be moving soon, so that he can start up with the uni again in a year and a half or so, inshaAllah.....
That said, it´s started getting to me lately that we have NEVER had a real bed. When we were in the dorm, we just took my mattress out of my room and put our two mattresses together on the floor at night (and piled them up on his bed during the day)...and after we moved into our apartment, we got a sofa bed, which we used until it broke. We also got a bedframe (from the spring clean up...)...but no mattresses, so the bed serves more as a cover for all of our things than anything else... because we don´t have any storage room in the apartment, either...alhamdulillah.
We took a mattress with us from the dorm (because they got new mattresses that year, we just took the old one with us)...alhamdulillah that´s what Jayjay and I use these days.
I put the mattress on the bedframe even though the mattress is too small and Jayjay and I sleep in the bedroom...my husband sleeps on the couch...in the living room.
For some reason, when the mattress was in the living room, I didn´t mind it that much that we didn´t have a bed...but Jayjay just doesn´t sleep if there is any light (computer) or noise (Baba) in the room, subhanAllah. If I want her to go to sleep before her father (at 2 a.m.), she needs to have a seperate bedroom...I can only hope that when we move, I can get her a small toddler bed...and I can leave her in there for the night where she will inshaAllah not fall face first onto the floor if she wakes up in the middle of the night...for a while, though, she´ll have my old bed...
Alhamdulillah I have a place to sleep. Especially when there are so many people in the world that have so many more problems than I do, subhanAllah.
Oh well...alhamdulillah. While I don´t like it, I guess I have to live with it.
...................................................................................................................................................................
I´ve kind of been thinking lately that either something is in the air or something is wrong. I know way too many sisters who have been going through problems lately. Doesn´t it seem strange that a proportionately larger number of Muslimahs have depression, eating disorders, sleep disorders, etc??? Why do so many more of us seem to have problems than the general population.
A lot of women find themselves having problems in their marriage. Either they feel left out, lonely, taken for granted, required to take on their husband´s culture...or maybe even all of that together.
While I prefer staying at home, it´d certainly be comforting to know that my husband listened to something I said now and then...instead of giving me the answer "I´m not interested in what you were talking about" after I tell him the same thing three times repeatedly with no answer.
And while I´ve gotten used to it and probably a little too complacent, maybe other women have more trouble with it.
I´ve pretty much lost all hope for this world. I even get kind of upset when somebody (my husband?) tries to put hopes in my head--like saying "hey, when you get home from visiting my family, if it goes well and we can change your visa, you´ll find a big mattress on the bed"......I don´t want him to put ideas in my head. That´s the way people get hurt. I had enough of that crud growing up from my mother. None of it comes true. Don´t even think about it. It´s not going to happen. Just concentrate on your prayer, on taking care of relationship with Allah subhanahuwata´ala and taking care of your family and forget the rest. There´s nothing in this life and that´s the way it´s going to stay whether we like it or not. Start planning for what´ll happen after this life, because that´s all we´ve got that´s really certain.
A woman I know says no. Her life is worth living and that she is worth it. I can understand her. I wish that I were like her sometimes...but I don´t think that making myself false hopes is really going to help me. But is laundry really the only thing we have to look forward to in life? Is spending hours in the kitchen to make our husband´s favorite dish (yabra? mahshi? maqlooba?) really life?
Yep.
Get used to it.
Try to look forward to your children. Try to raise them to be good Muslims. Try to keep your home clean and relatively pleasant to live in. Try to make your food enjoyable. Sometimes...always...it´s the little things that count. If you can´t find pleasure in the mundane...then yeah...life isn´t really fun...but Allah subhanahuwata´ala tests the people He loves, inshaAllah...and if we bear it all with patience, inshaAllah we´ll be rewarded.
Am I depressed? Yep. Do I have an eating disorder? Yep, but I try to control it, because we´re not allowed to harm ourselves as Muslims. Do I have a sleep disorder. Oh yeah. Do I wish that my marriage were happier? Yep. Has this life beaten me down? Yep.
Am I ungrateful? NO.
I am happy to have what I have, alhamdulillah. I have lived with much less than what I do now and I am happy that I now have at least a small amount of control over the way I live, alhamdulillah. I am sooooo grateful that Allah subhanahuwata´ala led me to Islam, alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah that I am here and have a chance at achieving Jannah, inshaAllah.
So I go on. And I put on a smiling face for my husband, because he provides for us. And I put on a smiling face for my daughter, because she doesn´t need to know what´s going on. And I ut a happy face on for my neighbors and aquaintances and anybody else that I cross paths with, inshaAllah....because that´s also jihad for me. Self-control means a lot.
Fi aman Allah,
Katherine
Friday, June 09, 2006
Starting to get shaky
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I´m starting to get a little nervous about the trip. I´ll be flying out on the 17th, inshaAllah.....My husband will come at the beginning of August, inshaAllah, but it´ll be about a month and a half.....
Now given, I can understand most of what people are saying...but I don´t speak much.....Oh well...at least I´ll get a lot of practice, inshaAllah.
I think it´ll be kind of cute to see Jayjay all dressed up for my SIL´s wedding, though, inshaAllah.
And my MIL wants to take me shopping for summer clothes, inshaAllah, because the last time I was there, I only got heavier weight skirts and clothing. Alhamdulillah, I´ve lost almost 20 lbs. since I was there the last time (Jayjay was only 3 months old at the time, subhanaAllah), so I guess it´s time to go shopping anyway, inshaAllah..........
Okay...so maybe I shouldn´t be toooo nervous. My in-laws are good people mashaAllah and inshaAllah it´ll be a really nice trip...
......................................................................................................................................................................
Jayjay was a little monster today...subhanaAllah. I wanted to iron and since I don´t have an ironing board, I was using a bench...which Jayjay constantly wanted to touch and walk up to and leave her toys on, etc..... So I picked her up and put her down next to her toys...and she SCREAMED at me. Oh my. She screamed and screamed. I still have no clue why... I eventually just put her in the living room and went and finished the headscarf I was ironing. Alhamdulillah she stopped crying before I came back into the living room, but she was just standing there in the doorway waiting for me with her running nose and tears in her eyes. Poor thing. Probably just wanted a little more attention? Allahu alim.
She also slept less than an hour for her first nap of the day. She usually sleeps from 12 p.m. to 2 p.m. for her first nap, mashaAllah...but today, I made the mistake of looking at her while she was turning in her sleep...cute little bugger just smiled big at me and started to get up...so now, she´s "reclining" on me while I type, mashaAllah, hehe.
I still need to do Qur´an with her today and I think I want to take her out to play on the playground, inshaAllah. After she gets done chewing on my eraser, of course, hehe. Yum.....
No poop explosions the last few days...I think that she´s got the idea, mashaAllah...and I am ecstatically happy about that, mashaAllah! Alhamdulillah!
I hope she´ll learn a lot in Syria, inshaAllah. Hearing Arabic all the time will probably help a lot, inshaAllah. She understands some of the things I tell her, but only in English...
......................................................................................................................................................................
I need to get a few things before I go...and I need to get a lot done. All of the laundry should be done and pressed, inshaAllah...I want to freeze a little bit of every meal I make this week so that my husband has some real meals and doesn´t have to spend much time cooking, inshaAllah...I´d like to dye my hair inshaAllah...and I need to get extra vitamins to take along, inshaAllah...I really dislike the diapers over there (like putting a plastic bag on your baby´s behind....um...no), so I´m going to take extra with me, inshaAllah...not to mention the baby wipes...ugh....inshaAllah once she can get going with the talking, we´ll be done with diapers once and for all (except maybe in the night.........we co-sleep, so I don´t think I´d like the idea of her going without a diaper during the night, hehe).
....................................................................................................................................................................
Now for something a little more controversial, I´m certain.
I got a little upset a couple days ago, because of a new person in one of my Muslimah´s group...
She doesn´t read nursery rhymes to her children, because she doesn´t want her children learning things that the "kuffar" children learn...and she thinks that we are obliged to hate all of the kuffar.
Okay...so the first thing I thought of was that there is no such thing as a kuffar child...all children are born Muslim and it´s the environment that they grow up in that leads them astray. I have been known to throw things away or give things away that don´t agree with Islam--i.e. books that focus on Christmas or (at my husband´s request, books or toys that featured pigs) or things that have something to do with magic or fairies or if I found some kind of shirk in the story...but I think that most of the mother goose rhymes are not going to corrupt your child...inshaAllah...pat-a-cake probably isn´t going to convince your child to someday stray from Islam...inshaAllah...of course there´s always a first for everything...but I just don´t think that´s realistic, hehe.
We, as Muslim parents, do have a greater responsibility when we decide to raise our children in the west and we do have to be on the look-out and a whole lot warier about what we put into our child´s heads...but I´m American. I´d like my daughter to have a little bit of my culture, too, inshaAllah. I mean...I can give her everything that doesn´t go against Islam and throw out the rest, inshaAllah--which is exactly what I had to do after become Muslim, alhamdulillah and it´s what anybody who comes to Islam has to do no matter what their culture or nationality.
The second thing that I thought of was that we should definately hate kufr...but not people. Of course we as muslims should hate disbelief and shirk of all sorts.......but your non-muslim next door neighbor could become Muslim tomorrow, inshaAllah...and I don´t know about you, but I´d find it kind of hard to hate my parents, may Allah subhanahuwata´ala guide them to the right path. Ameen....hate kufr, not the kuffar. A lot of people haven´t had the opportunity to hear the call of Islam...which brings me to another thing.
As Muslims, we are also obliged to call people to Islam--especially if we live in a non-muslim land, we have the responsibility to make dawah....which is kind of hard when you hate everyone. And is it really logical that ANYBODY would WANT to come to Islam when all they see is that you despise them? That just shows them that Islam is some kind of hateful religion, which it isn´t.
Okay. That was my rant for the day.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
I´m starting to get a little nervous about the trip. I´ll be flying out on the 17th, inshaAllah.....My husband will come at the beginning of August, inshaAllah, but it´ll be about a month and a half.....
Now given, I can understand most of what people are saying...but I don´t speak much.....Oh well...at least I´ll get a lot of practice, inshaAllah.
I think it´ll be kind of cute to see Jayjay all dressed up for my SIL´s wedding, though, inshaAllah.
And my MIL wants to take me shopping for summer clothes, inshaAllah, because the last time I was there, I only got heavier weight skirts and clothing. Alhamdulillah, I´ve lost almost 20 lbs. since I was there the last time (Jayjay was only 3 months old at the time, subhanaAllah), so I guess it´s time to go shopping anyway, inshaAllah..........
Okay...so maybe I shouldn´t be toooo nervous. My in-laws are good people mashaAllah and inshaAllah it´ll be a really nice trip...
......................................................................................................................................................................
Jayjay was a little monster today...subhanaAllah. I wanted to iron and since I don´t have an ironing board, I was using a bench...which Jayjay constantly wanted to touch and walk up to and leave her toys on, etc..... So I picked her up and put her down next to her toys...and she SCREAMED at me. Oh my. She screamed and screamed. I still have no clue why... I eventually just put her in the living room and went and finished the headscarf I was ironing. Alhamdulillah she stopped crying before I came back into the living room, but she was just standing there in the doorway waiting for me with her running nose and tears in her eyes. Poor thing. Probably just wanted a little more attention? Allahu alim.
She also slept less than an hour for her first nap of the day. She usually sleeps from 12 p.m. to 2 p.m. for her first nap, mashaAllah...but today, I made the mistake of looking at her while she was turning in her sleep...cute little bugger just smiled big at me and started to get up...so now, she´s "reclining" on me while I type, mashaAllah, hehe.
I still need to do Qur´an with her today and I think I want to take her out to play on the playground, inshaAllah. After she gets done chewing on my eraser, of course, hehe. Yum.....
No poop explosions the last few days...I think that she´s got the idea, mashaAllah...and I am ecstatically happy about that, mashaAllah! Alhamdulillah!
I hope she´ll learn a lot in Syria, inshaAllah. Hearing Arabic all the time will probably help a lot, inshaAllah. She understands some of the things I tell her, but only in English...
......................................................................................................................................................................
I need to get a few things before I go...and I need to get a lot done. All of the laundry should be done and pressed, inshaAllah...I want to freeze a little bit of every meal I make this week so that my husband has some real meals and doesn´t have to spend much time cooking, inshaAllah...I´d like to dye my hair inshaAllah...and I need to get extra vitamins to take along, inshaAllah...I really dislike the diapers over there (like putting a plastic bag on your baby´s behind....um...no), so I´m going to take extra with me, inshaAllah...not to mention the baby wipes...ugh....inshaAllah once she can get going with the talking, we´ll be done with diapers once and for all (except maybe in the night.........we co-sleep, so I don´t think I´d like the idea of her going without a diaper during the night, hehe).
....................................................................................................................................................................
Now for something a little more controversial, I´m certain.
I got a little upset a couple days ago, because of a new person in one of my Muslimah´s group...
She doesn´t read nursery rhymes to her children, because she doesn´t want her children learning things that the "kuffar" children learn...and she thinks that we are obliged to hate all of the kuffar.
Okay...so the first thing I thought of was that there is no such thing as a kuffar child...all children are born Muslim and it´s the environment that they grow up in that leads them astray. I have been known to throw things away or give things away that don´t agree with Islam--i.e. books that focus on Christmas or (at my husband´s request, books or toys that featured pigs) or things that have something to do with magic or fairies or if I found some kind of shirk in the story...but I think that most of the mother goose rhymes are not going to corrupt your child...inshaAllah...pat-a-cake probably isn´t going to convince your child to someday stray from Islam...inshaAllah...of course there´s always a first for everything...but I just don´t think that´s realistic, hehe.
We, as Muslim parents, do have a greater responsibility when we decide to raise our children in the west and we do have to be on the look-out and a whole lot warier about what we put into our child´s heads...but I´m American. I´d like my daughter to have a little bit of my culture, too, inshaAllah. I mean...I can give her everything that doesn´t go against Islam and throw out the rest, inshaAllah--which is exactly what I had to do after become Muslim, alhamdulillah and it´s what anybody who comes to Islam has to do no matter what their culture or nationality.
The second thing that I thought of was that we should definately hate kufr...but not people. Of course we as muslims should hate disbelief and shirk of all sorts.......but your non-muslim next door neighbor could become Muslim tomorrow, inshaAllah...and I don´t know about you, but I´d find it kind of hard to hate my parents, may Allah subhanahuwata´ala guide them to the right path. Ameen....hate kufr, not the kuffar. A lot of people haven´t had the opportunity to hear the call of Islam...which brings me to another thing.
As Muslims, we are also obliged to call people to Islam--especially if we live in a non-muslim land, we have the responsibility to make dawah....which is kind of hard when you hate everyone. And is it really logical that ANYBODY would WANT to come to Islam when all they see is that you despise them? That just shows them that Islam is some kind of hateful religion, which it isn´t.
Okay. That was my rant for the day.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Thursday, June 08, 2006
JazakAllah
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I just wanted to say jazakAllah to all those who posted comments, mashaAllah. InshaAllah I´ll add you to my links list so that I can visit your blogs.
............................................................................................................................................
I´m feeling a little off today. I can´t believe sometimes how unpleasant it is to live without relatives of any sort. My family lives an ocean away.....my husband´s family also lives on a different continent...it´s just the three of us...him, me and mini-me (Jayjay)...
I was sick for about five days last week...so bad that my husband offered to take me to the hospital...which I refused...but alhamdulillah I´m starting to feel better.
But there is NOBODY to take care of me...and I still have to take care of Jayjay and my husband...no matter how crappy I feel--physically or mentally.
I just about go nuts when I´m laying on the couch feeling sick and my husband asks me when the last time I vacuumed was. That´s happened a couple times in the last couple years.....You want to see me get into fighting stance? Accuse me of not being clean enough when I´m sick.
I understand that he works and isn´t home much...but at least the house is organized if not vacuumed, inshaAllah...It´s not like I´m a slob...I guess it´s my own fault for marrying another clean freak (actually, he´s not obsessively clean...he´s just become obsessive about me being clean, hehe)...
....................................................................................................................................................................
We´ll be moving back to the states at the end of the year, inshaAllah...I´d like to start a small business by sewing abayas, khimars, tunics and skirts for Muslimahs. Seeing as how there aren´t any (that I know of) Muslimahs in my hometown, I think I´ll have to make a website or maybe start out by selling them on ebay? Allahu alim. I´m pretty motivated. My husband would prefer that I import from his country and then resell them, but I think I´d like to have more control over the whole process. InshaAllah if I prove to him that I can put out quality he´ll get behind my idea a little more.
I´ve made it a priority to include a good sewing machine in the purchases that I need to make immediately when we arrive, inshaAllah.
I´m a pretty good sewer, mashaAllah and inshaAllah I´ll improve quickly. I´ve already sewn a few baby things for Jayjay (by hand, though, because I don´t have a sewing machine here) and I used to sew all the time at home...InshaAllah, I´d offer a few different necklines--square, crew, v-neck--and I´d like to offer a wrap abayas and abayas with zippers or buttons that go halfway down the front for nursing mamas, inshaAllah. I think that it´d also be good to offer to make the abaya in an empire cut or to leave it straight, inshaAllah. I could also maybe offer to make them reversible, inshaAllah.
The khimars could be offered in three different lengths: waist, knee and full length (like a head abaya), inshaAllah.
I could also see if maybe I could make a matching square hijab or shayla or niqab for each abaya? InshaAllah.
I have some ideas for skirts, too, inshaAllah. I like the typical round skirts, but I have this idea for a skirt that would be relatively straight to about the knees and then from the knee to the ankle/top of the foot, it´d have three box pleats in the front and three in the back, inshaAllah. The zipper would be in the back, inshaAllah. I think it´d look great in almost any fabric, inshaAllah.
For the tunics, I´d like to make them kind of like shorter abayas. I´d offer all of the same necklines and zippers or buttons for the mama muslimahs, inshaAllah. I´m not sure if I´d offer them in two lengths (hip and knee) or whether I´d just go with knee length, inshaAllah?
Of course this is all just ideas. InshaAllah I´d probably have to start out a little slower. Maybe I´d start out by offering my services to some of the Muslimahs I know online, inshaAllah? Then I could use their reviews of my products to better my quality and service, inshaAllah. And then I could maybe really set up shop, inshaAllah? I expect it´ll take a while before anything takes off.
I just figure that it´s a way to help the Ummah, inshaAllah and have an income to help my husband through college, inshaAllah...and I believe that if I´m not doing something with the intention of pleasing Allah subhanahuwata´ala then I will fail-no matter what it is...
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
I just wanted to say jazakAllah to all those who posted comments, mashaAllah. InshaAllah I´ll add you to my links list so that I can visit your blogs.
............................................................................................................................................
I´m feeling a little off today. I can´t believe sometimes how unpleasant it is to live without relatives of any sort. My family lives an ocean away.....my husband´s family also lives on a different continent...it´s just the three of us...him, me and mini-me (Jayjay)...
I was sick for about five days last week...so bad that my husband offered to take me to the hospital...which I refused...but alhamdulillah I´m starting to feel better.
But there is NOBODY to take care of me...and I still have to take care of Jayjay and my husband...no matter how crappy I feel--physically or mentally.
I just about go nuts when I´m laying on the couch feeling sick and my husband asks me when the last time I vacuumed was. That´s happened a couple times in the last couple years.....You want to see me get into fighting stance? Accuse me of not being clean enough when I´m sick.
I understand that he works and isn´t home much...but at least the house is organized if not vacuumed, inshaAllah...It´s not like I´m a slob...I guess it´s my own fault for marrying another clean freak (actually, he´s not obsessively clean...he´s just become obsessive about me being clean, hehe)...
....................................................................................................................................................................
We´ll be moving back to the states at the end of the year, inshaAllah...I´d like to start a small business by sewing abayas, khimars, tunics and skirts for Muslimahs. Seeing as how there aren´t any (that I know of) Muslimahs in my hometown, I think I´ll have to make a website or maybe start out by selling them on ebay? Allahu alim. I´m pretty motivated. My husband would prefer that I import from his country and then resell them, but I think I´d like to have more control over the whole process. InshaAllah if I prove to him that I can put out quality he´ll get behind my idea a little more.
I´ve made it a priority to include a good sewing machine in the purchases that I need to make immediately when we arrive, inshaAllah.
I´m a pretty good sewer, mashaAllah and inshaAllah I´ll improve quickly. I´ve already sewn a few baby things for Jayjay (by hand, though, because I don´t have a sewing machine here) and I used to sew all the time at home...InshaAllah, I´d offer a few different necklines--square, crew, v-neck--and I´d like to offer a wrap abayas and abayas with zippers or buttons that go halfway down the front for nursing mamas, inshaAllah. I think that it´d also be good to offer to make the abaya in an empire cut or to leave it straight, inshaAllah. I could also maybe offer to make them reversible, inshaAllah.
The khimars could be offered in three different lengths: waist, knee and full length (like a head abaya), inshaAllah.
I could also see if maybe I could make a matching square hijab or shayla or niqab for each abaya? InshaAllah.
I have some ideas for skirts, too, inshaAllah. I like the typical round skirts, but I have this idea for a skirt that would be relatively straight to about the knees and then from the knee to the ankle/top of the foot, it´d have three box pleats in the front and three in the back, inshaAllah. The zipper would be in the back, inshaAllah. I think it´d look great in almost any fabric, inshaAllah.
For the tunics, I´d like to make them kind of like shorter abayas. I´d offer all of the same necklines and zippers or buttons for the mama muslimahs, inshaAllah. I´m not sure if I´d offer them in two lengths (hip and knee) or whether I´d just go with knee length, inshaAllah?
Of course this is all just ideas. InshaAllah I´d probably have to start out a little slower. Maybe I´d start out by offering my services to some of the Muslimahs I know online, inshaAllah? Then I could use their reviews of my products to better my quality and service, inshaAllah. And then I could maybe really set up shop, inshaAllah? I expect it´ll take a while before anything takes off.
I just figure that it´s a way to help the Ummah, inshaAllah and have an income to help my husband through college, inshaAllah...and I believe that if I´m not doing something with the intention of pleasing Allah subhanahuwata´ala then I will fail-no matter what it is...
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Wednesday, June 07, 2006
This is great
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
Third post of the day...
MashaAllah, I guess I´m getting excited now, because I can ramble on about things that I normally would talk about (not so interesting topics, but topics that I think a lot about)...
So now, I was thinking....................................I try so hard to be the person I want to be, inshaAllah. I have this ideal in my head....the ideal Muslimah...ideal Mama.....ideal wife, etc........I wonder sometimes if I try too hard and whether it´s starting to get to me... Allahu alim.
Alhamdulillah, I try to be a good Muslimah...I find myself on occasion trying to make myself slow down, though...because I´m afraid that I´ll overdo it....like I won´t pray sunnah for every prayer everyday, because I´m afraid that if I push myself I´ll fall. And then I won´t pray sunnah again for a long time...Allah alim.
And I annoy my husband at least once a month with "can I wear niqab?" Which I know that he doesn´t want me to wear here, because he´s afraid for my safety...alhamdulillah, at least I´ll be able to wear it when I go to visit his family (all the women in his family wear niqab, mashaAllah!)......
And I have this thing about being thin...at one point in my life it got pretty bad...and I wonder if I´m headed down that road again. I had my little girl, so naturally I gained weight for a while...but now I weigh less than I did when I got pregnant, alhamdulillah....and I´m still losing weight, mashaAllah. I think it´s because of the breastfeeding, but I´m also careful about what I put in my mouth, inshaAllah. I think I´m afraid of what I would do if the scale suddenly didn´t go down anymore. I mean....I haven´t the weight quickly. It´s been slow and there have been plateaus...but I so want to get to a weight where people look at me and say "wow, you´re skinny, mashaAllah" I´ve only just entered the "you´re very fit, mashaAllah" stage...I just need to learn when to stop before it gets to be unhealthy, inshaAllah.
I also have issues about the house being VERY clean. I pick up my daughter´s toys and assorted messes probably 5 times a day, wa Allahu alim. And when AF comes to visit and I start to get depression from my raging hormones and the pain is so much that I can barely get out of the bed...the apartment doesn´t look good for a few days...it looks like a tornado went through sometimes...or maybe it´ll look okay on the surface, but the reality of things is that I haven´t vacuumed, dusted or mopped in three days......and dishes are piling up......which makes me crazy. I feel like a failure... Alhamdulillah that passes, though, inshaAllah...
Anywho........I wonder when I´ll be old enough to finally start letting go a little, inshaAllah.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Third post of the day...
MashaAllah, I guess I´m getting excited now, because I can ramble on about things that I normally would talk about (not so interesting topics, but topics that I think a lot about)...
So now, I was thinking....................................I try so hard to be the person I want to be, inshaAllah. I have this ideal in my head....the ideal Muslimah...ideal Mama.....ideal wife, etc........I wonder sometimes if I try too hard and whether it´s starting to get to me... Allahu alim.
Alhamdulillah, I try to be a good Muslimah...I find myself on occasion trying to make myself slow down, though...because I´m afraid that I´ll overdo it....like I won´t pray sunnah for every prayer everyday, because I´m afraid that if I push myself I´ll fall. And then I won´t pray sunnah again for a long time...Allah alim.
And I annoy my husband at least once a month with "can I wear niqab?" Which I know that he doesn´t want me to wear here, because he´s afraid for my safety...alhamdulillah, at least I´ll be able to wear it when I go to visit his family (all the women in his family wear niqab, mashaAllah!)......
And I have this thing about being thin...at one point in my life it got pretty bad...and I wonder if I´m headed down that road again. I had my little girl, so naturally I gained weight for a while...but now I weigh less than I did when I got pregnant, alhamdulillah....and I´m still losing weight, mashaAllah. I think it´s because of the breastfeeding, but I´m also careful about what I put in my mouth, inshaAllah. I think I´m afraid of what I would do if the scale suddenly didn´t go down anymore. I mean....I haven´t the weight quickly. It´s been slow and there have been plateaus...but I so want to get to a weight where people look at me and say "wow, you´re skinny, mashaAllah" I´ve only just entered the "you´re very fit, mashaAllah" stage...I just need to learn when to stop before it gets to be unhealthy, inshaAllah.
I also have issues about the house being VERY clean. I pick up my daughter´s toys and assorted messes probably 5 times a day, wa Allahu alim. And when AF comes to visit and I start to get depression from my raging hormones and the pain is so much that I can barely get out of the bed...the apartment doesn´t look good for a few days...it looks like a tornado went through sometimes...or maybe it´ll look okay on the surface, but the reality of things is that I haven´t vacuumed, dusted or mopped in three days......and dishes are piling up......which makes me crazy. I feel like a failure... Alhamdulillah that passes, though, inshaAllah...
Anywho........I wonder when I´ll be old enough to finally start letting go a little, inshaAllah.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Umrah with a baby?
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
Oki doki...another post today....
I was walking back home from the drugstore and mashaAllah Jayjay was being a very good little girl and behaving in her stroller......................and then it hit me:
I will NOT be taking the stroller with me to visit my in-laws...if I don´t have the stroller at my in-laws, then it logically follows that I won´t have it when we (inshaAllah) leave to go for Umrah..............
We will be in Saudi Arabia for about a month, inshaAllah.....but that means a month of carrying around a 25 lb. little monster......my back hurts enough from carrying her around my one bedroom apartment, subhanAllah! And my MIL and FIL are much worse off in the back pain category...........yikes.
I frantically called a friend of mine about maybe borrowing her sling for the two months I´ll be out of the country, but no answer....she hasn´t called me back yet either...mmmmmmm......then I frantically called my mother.......who also lives an ocean away at the moment........she´ll see what she can do (especially since it has to be good for a bigger baby, inshaAllah), inshaAllah, but I don´t know if she can get anything shipped here in ten days...and that would be assuming that she got and sent the sling today!
At any rate, I´ll survive, inshaAllah! I´m just happy to be getting the chance to go to Umrah. I´m a little worried about the language, but I´ll learn quickly, inshaAllah. I finally have an arabic coursebook which helps....but I still look over all of the words with my husband so that I know which words are different in dialect, inshaAllah...
And it´ll help Jayjay, inshaAllah, because so far, she only understands things in English (other than "Taai habibti", hehe)...I think that´s because my husband has been working a lot lately...wa Allahu alim. She doesn´t hear as much Arabic as she does English.
Anywho....there´s my panic for the day...the other things are smaller...like getting the apartment to look absolutely perfect and having every corner clean and organized before I go so that I don´t come back to a wasteland (my husband isn´t flying with me...although he´ll fly to stay for the last two weeks before I fly back, inshaAllah).....
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Oki doki...another post today....
I was walking back home from the drugstore and mashaAllah Jayjay was being a very good little girl and behaving in her stroller......................and then it hit me:
I will NOT be taking the stroller with me to visit my in-laws...if I don´t have the stroller at my in-laws, then it logically follows that I won´t have it when we (inshaAllah) leave to go for Umrah..............
We will be in Saudi Arabia for about a month, inshaAllah.....but that means a month of carrying around a 25 lb. little monster......my back hurts enough from carrying her around my one bedroom apartment, subhanAllah! And my MIL and FIL are much worse off in the back pain category...........yikes.
I frantically called a friend of mine about maybe borrowing her sling for the two months I´ll be out of the country, but no answer....she hasn´t called me back yet either...mmmmmmm......then I frantically called my mother.......who also lives an ocean away at the moment........she´ll see what she can do (especially since it has to be good for a bigger baby, inshaAllah), inshaAllah, but I don´t know if she can get anything shipped here in ten days...and that would be assuming that she got and sent the sling today!
At any rate, I´ll survive, inshaAllah! I´m just happy to be getting the chance to go to Umrah. I´m a little worried about the language, but I´ll learn quickly, inshaAllah. I finally have an arabic coursebook which helps....but I still look over all of the words with my husband so that I know which words are different in dialect, inshaAllah...
And it´ll help Jayjay, inshaAllah, because so far, she only understands things in English (other than "Taai habibti", hehe)...I think that´s because my husband has been working a lot lately...wa Allahu alim. She doesn´t hear as much Arabic as she does English.
Anywho....there´s my panic for the day...the other things are smaller...like getting the apartment to look absolutely perfect and having every corner clean and organized before I go so that I don´t come back to a wasteland (my husband isn´t flying with me...although he´ll fly to stay for the last two weeks before I fly back, inshaAllah).....
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Progress
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I seem to be making more progress with Jayjay´s toilet training than I thought I would...at least it´s faster than I expected alhamdulillah.
I was getting pretty fed up with the morning baby poop explosions, so I started putting her on the toilet every now and then about a week ago...she started getting the idea it seems and now pees on the toilet after every nap...of course I have to hold her there, because this was kind of a spontaneous thing on my part and we don´t have a training toilet for her yet (good thing she likes the toilet...yuck...)...
So anywho...I held her over the toilet this morning about fifteen minutes after she woke up this morning and said "Stinky!" and wonder of wonders, NO POOP EXPLOSION this morning, alhamdulillah!!! She pooped in the toilet for the first time! Yay! MashaAllah! No poop up to her armpits! No poop running out of the sides of her diaper! No soiled clothes! MashaAllah! MashaAllah! MashaAllah! "
And here I am...crazy Mama...running around saying "Bravo Jayjay! Bravo! Good girl! You went poop in the toilet! Good girl! You´re such a good girl, mashaAllah! MashaAllah! MashaAllah!
It feels sooo good to just flush the toilet and be done with it...hehe. MashaAllah.
Now....given...my daughter is only 10 months old (well 2 days shy of 10 months old)...so she´s not running up to me and saying poo or pee when she has to go...she doesn´t even walk into the bathroom by herself...BUT...she now knows that when Mama puts her over the toilet in the morning, she should relieve herself...and she knows that when Mama puts her over the toilet after her naps and before bed, she should relieve herself...Alhamdulillah, this is easier than I thought, hehe.
InshaAllah, I´ll be going to visit my in-laws soon in the ME, where they have both the western and arab toilets...inshaAllah I can just take her to the arab style toilet and I won´t have to hold her anymore...and inshaAllah she´ll be toilet trained around a year...but we´re taking this slowly, inshaAllah......I don´t want to traumatize the kid!!! InshaAllah khair!
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
I seem to be making more progress with Jayjay´s toilet training than I thought I would...at least it´s faster than I expected alhamdulillah.
I was getting pretty fed up with the morning baby poop explosions, so I started putting her on the toilet every now and then about a week ago...she started getting the idea it seems and now pees on the toilet after every nap...of course I have to hold her there, because this was kind of a spontaneous thing on my part and we don´t have a training toilet for her yet (good thing she likes the toilet...yuck...)...
So anywho...I held her over the toilet this morning about fifteen minutes after she woke up this morning and said "Stinky!" and wonder of wonders, NO POOP EXPLOSION this morning, alhamdulillah!!! She pooped in the toilet for the first time! Yay! MashaAllah! No poop up to her armpits! No poop running out of the sides of her diaper! No soiled clothes! MashaAllah! MashaAllah! MashaAllah! "
And here I am...crazy Mama...running around saying "Bravo Jayjay! Bravo! Good girl! You went poop in the toilet! Good girl! You´re such a good girl, mashaAllah! MashaAllah! MashaAllah!
It feels sooo good to just flush the toilet and be done with it...hehe. MashaAllah.
Now....given...my daughter is only 10 months old (well 2 days shy of 10 months old)...so she´s not running up to me and saying poo or pee when she has to go...she doesn´t even walk into the bathroom by herself...BUT...she now knows that when Mama puts her over the toilet in the morning, she should relieve herself...and she knows that when Mama puts her over the toilet after her naps and before bed, she should relieve herself...Alhamdulillah, this is easier than I thought, hehe.
InshaAllah, I´ll be going to visit my in-laws soon in the ME, where they have both the western and arab toilets...inshaAllah I can just take her to the arab style toilet and I won´t have to hold her anymore...and inshaAllah she´ll be toilet trained around a year...but we´re taking this slowly, inshaAllah......I don´t want to traumatize the kid!!! InshaAllah khair!
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Tuesday, June 06, 2006
My little fluffy...
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
I am the mother of a cute little thing who we all call Jayjay (little hen), alhamdulillah. She´s going to be 10 months old in a couple of days, inshaAllah...............she runs around like a wild thing, is starting to use the toilet, and can turn the pages of her board books, but she doesn´t say anything more interesting than "up"................she runs through our apartment screaming yayayayayayaya gagagagagagagagaga wawawawawawawawa babababababababa......but she doesn´t say mama or baba and actually know what it means....oh well, I´m sure that will come with time, too, inshaAllah!!!
That said, I´m trying to do what I can to help her grow up, inshaAllah. I´m a little early I suppose, but inshaAllah I want her to be the best Muslimah, person, etc. she can be..............
I decided to make a blog after doing a search on Islamic homeschooling, because I found a lot of blogs from sisters that homeschooled their children in my search, mashaAllah. InshaAllah I´d like to homeschool Jayjay if there isn´t an Islamic school that I approve of in my area. I´ve been looking through all kinds of information and looking for websites that might help me think of what to do with her before she is old enough to be schooled.
For now, I´m just going to continue doing what I have been doing, though, inshaAllah.
I sing her the abc´s and tell her (because I can´t sing them, hehe) the Arabic alphabet. I count for her. I recite the last 14 surat to her daily, so that maybe she´ll pick them up slowly, inshaAllah. I read to her daily. I talk with her. I also try to make sure that I make myself as good a role model as possible.
Brigham Young said something to the effect of, "you should never allow yourself to do anything that you aren´t willing to see your children do."
I read that quote a few months back and it makes a lot of sense. Of course Allah subhanahuwata´ala leads whom He wills and leads astray whom He wills, but inshaAllah I can help to raise my daughter to be a good Muslimah if I myself look after the Deen and do what I can to keep my Iman strong.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
I am the mother of a cute little thing who we all call Jayjay (little hen), alhamdulillah. She´s going to be 10 months old in a couple of days, inshaAllah...............she runs around like a wild thing, is starting to use the toilet, and can turn the pages of her board books, but she doesn´t say anything more interesting than "up"................she runs through our apartment screaming yayayayayayaya gagagagagagagagaga wawawawawawawawa babababababababa......but she doesn´t say mama or baba and actually know what it means....oh well, I´m sure that will come with time, too, inshaAllah!!!
That said, I´m trying to do what I can to help her grow up, inshaAllah. I´m a little early I suppose, but inshaAllah I want her to be the best Muslimah, person, etc. she can be..............
I decided to make a blog after doing a search on Islamic homeschooling, because I found a lot of blogs from sisters that homeschooled their children in my search, mashaAllah. InshaAllah I´d like to homeschool Jayjay if there isn´t an Islamic school that I approve of in my area. I´ve been looking through all kinds of information and looking for websites that might help me think of what to do with her before she is old enough to be schooled.
For now, I´m just going to continue doing what I have been doing, though, inshaAllah.
I sing her the abc´s and tell her (because I can´t sing them, hehe) the Arabic alphabet. I count for her. I recite the last 14 surat to her daily, so that maybe she´ll pick them up slowly, inshaAllah. I read to her daily. I talk with her. I also try to make sure that I make myself as good a role model as possible.
Brigham Young said something to the effect of, "you should never allow yourself to do anything that you aren´t willing to see your children do."
I read that quote a few months back and it makes a lot of sense. Of course Allah subhanahuwata´ala leads whom He wills and leads astray whom He wills, but inshaAllah I can help to raise my daughter to be a good Muslimah if I myself look after the Deen and do what I can to keep my Iman strong.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
My first post
Assalamu alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh,
Here I am for the first time, inshaAllah......and inshaAllah not the last. I want a place for me thoughts and day to day happenings..............I can´t promise that it´ll be interesting, but inshaAllah I won´t bore anyone who reads this toooo much.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
Here I am for the first time, inshaAllah......and inshaAllah not the last. I want a place for me thoughts and day to day happenings..............I can´t promise that it´ll be interesting, but inshaAllah I won´t bore anyone who reads this toooo much.
Fi aman Allah,
UmmBatul
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